the score......

in this corner, 18 pounds of sucky, rub my tummy furball...... his name is xaos*. in this corner, well my weight ain't none of your damned business, but let's just say we're over 10x that of the cat.

but every once in a while, when i get deathly sick.... kitty seems to take the whole pack animal thing to heart. i come down with the cold from hell..... kitty gets a look in his eyes that says the leader is sick, he must die. and what ensues is 2 days of hissing and growling as he follows me around the house. i've had him chase me down the hall clawing my ankle one time. usually he gets banished to the library under his chair, and we exist in an uneasy truce.

and it's only me. my better half can walk into the room and pat his head, or scratch under his chin, and he'll purr and act like she's got tuna hidden somewhere on her. i walk into the room, and the ears go back, growling and the attack position ensues.

however, this time..... my son got in the way. the cat must have felt cornered - he leaped over the boy, landed sideways, and scrabbled to get his feet under him - scratching my son (and destroying his shirt).

so we had ourselves a little discussion about who was dominant male. i'll admit, at one point when i had the furry sonofabitch by the throat i wasn't thinking nice thoughts.

i'll tell you what an 18 lb cat is. he's one pound of fur, 3 pounds of teeth and nails, and 14 pounds of killing fury. i can honestly say that i may have won the battle, but i lost the war.


he got his back feet loose for 30 seconds. when i got his back feet back under control, i lost my hold on his neck. it's amazing how much an angry cat can maul you in a short time.

the next night he was curled up in my lap, purring as i rubbed his tummy. while i made plans to phone the doctor because while the scratches were ok, the bites above were already infected, and had that pleasant oozing, scabby look going on.

yes, those scratches are going to leave a scar. yes, the hand is ok.

no, i don't know who's dominant in this house. and no, i'm not really in the mood to put it to the test anytime soon.

*xaos, is the original greek form of 'chaos'. and just in case you're wondering, i do have a second cat. his name is confusion. when i say chaos and confusion rule the house - i'm not kidding.